The Ball of Cary Muir Four-and-twenty virgins came down from Inverness, And when the ball was over, there were four-and-twenty less. CHORUS Singin' balls to your partner, your arse against the wall! If you've never been had on a Saturday night, you've never been had at all! CHORUS The undertaker, he was there all wrapped up in a shroud, Swinging from the chandelier and peeing on the crowd. CHORUS The village cripple, he was there, but he could not do much. So, he lined the ladies at the wall and did 'em with his crutch. CHORUS Miss Mary MacPherson was standing way up front, Some posies in her hand and a carrot in her c*nt. CHORUS The village postman, he was there, but the poor man had the pox. He could not do the lassie, so he did the letterbox. CHORUS The village magician, he was there, he gave us all a laugh. He pulled his foreskin over his head and vanished up his ass! CHORUS